>> Monday, September 27, 2010
Loving Myself writes:
I struggled with exercise anorexia for three years. At 5'6" and 85 pounds, I was more than endangering my health. I was always a perfectionist; competitive dancer, restaurant hostess, dance teacher, barista, perfect attendance, and over a 4.0 in throughout high school. I never game myself a break, never cried, never stopped, never stepped out of the lines of my strict diet regime, and always made sure all my friends and family were happy and proud.
My family never intervened, so I never really thought it was a serious problem. I was unhappy about my weight, hated that I had not developed into any sort of woman figure; I looked like a frail 90 year old woman. Clothes never fit me, dresses for my prom and winter formal had to be tailored extra small. I hated looking in the mirror, hated going out because I could feel people staring, feel them judging. But I couldn't stop. Whenever I was stressed I had no idea how to talk about the problem, my only way for dealing with them was to limit my eating and work out all the time (morning, afternoon and evening), the more pain my body felt the more I could feel my sadness and stress being released; counting calories and fat rather than nutrition.
It was not until my second year of college that I finally started to get better. I lived with three girls, who really loved and cared about me, they did not segregate me because of my problem. They showed me how to enjoy life, how to balance exercise, and how it was okay to fail, okay to eat ice cream, okay to take a second helping. One of the girls I lived with was actually a Food Science and Nutrition major (I was civil engineering major) and she shared with me the importance of fats, minerals and vitamins; how to eat a healthy diet based on nutritional value not calories.
That year, I finally realized what it felt like to be happy, to laugh, and to love myself. I also realized that I needed to take care of my health and happiness before others because I will be with this body and my mentality for the rest of my life; and this is my responsibility, no one else's.
I graduated in June 2008 with a Bachelor’s degree in civil engineering; but my greatest accomplishments were internal and external changes I had made in my health. Nutrition and fitness became my hobby and focus; something I always loved and came natural at.
I was an engineer for a few years, but never was never happy with what I was doing and who I was surrounding myself with. So this year I decided to finally go for my dream . . . starting my own personal training and nutritional advising solo company, Pristine Fitness. I want to help people just as I helped myself. As well as share all I have learned about the body (exercise and nutrition) and how to live a happy, healthy, balanced life.
Thanks for reading my story!
Loving Myself (from Pristine Fitness)
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